I wrote my struggles with binge eating. I have a problem. There should be no shame in eating. There should also be no guilt when it comes to the love of good food. However, I felt shame and guilt. I stopped caring at some times and I think I'm hungry at other times. I have low self worth and I often feel guilty about my weight, or at least feel guilty about gaining weight. I had thoughts about wondering what were to happen if I had stayed on that diet, how I would look. I often wished that I had stuck to this diet. I felt bad about my body and deep down, I have since I could remember. I dieted and lost and gained weight since I was in fourth grade. I often weighed more than the other kids and was made fun of because of it. I had friends and a social life, but I lacked confidence when it came to dating. I never felt I was attractive enough. I even hated looking at some of my pictures. Other people had great looking school pictures but I never thought I photographed well, not even til this day. I wanted to change things for years, but now is the time to take a stand. I am finally being honest and I am finally getting help. I wish this could be a regular entry, but following a plan has been hard and creating a journal has been even harder. I am feeling so much better about things and about myself because for the first time, I am finally being honest with myself.