Saturday, November 29, 2014

Thanksgiving leftovers

For the past 2 days, I realize that the ham will be gone soon and so will the pie.  Sure it was delicious. However, my waistline says something else entirely.  Right now my stomach hurts.  I am not sure if it is the pie, the mashed potatoes, or the turkey, or the ham.  Okay, it may be all of the above plus the coffee and the water.  Since I drank the water however, I began to feel better.  After this weekend, my plan is to consume healthier foods and consume all foods in moderation.  That has always been more of a goal of mine.  I just don't like the idea of dieting.  It helps to count calories, but on the other hand, even counting calories can be a chore.

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Thanksgiving food and diet reflection

Here is the tea, which I drank quite a bit of.

I ate a large Thanksgiving feast.  It wasn't a meal.  It was a feast.  I had not only a turkey but the usual Sunday fare aside from sweet potato pie.  Pink cloud is an interesting food.  It isn't technically a dessert but can be eaten as one.  This Thanksgiving should be a time not just of great food, but making sure that that good foods doesn't expand my waistline, at least not that much.  I realize that I need to take the time to realize the effects of Thanksgiving dinner on my waistline as well as my taste buds.

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

The day before Thanksgiving

The answer is no . I will not give up.  Here is what I ate.

Green Beans

Yep, that was all I consumed today, as well as a whole of water.  Since today is the day before Thanksgiving, I tend to eat light.  Thanksgiving, however, is a day where I tend to consume anything but light foods.

Monday, November 24, 2014

Should i Give Up?

I feel like I should.  However, I do something so stupid.  I am a person who doesn't wish to quit.  I really don't want to give up.  I am just tired.  Am I really 40, fat, and fed up?  Could it be that life is passing me by?  I know it makes no sense whether or not I should give up.  Eating two bags of popcorn will not help me lose weight, especially when one of them has added butter.  That to me is a symbol of my wanting to give up.  I have grown tired of logging in everything that I have eaten and all of what I drink during the course of a day.  Sometimes being fat is too much to bear.  Also, being tired is even more.  Should I give up?  No I should not give up, because I am ever hopeful.  Eating loaves of bread, chicken, and white rice would also not constitute a healthy diet either.  Sometimes, I cannot take anymore.  Other times I just wish to get started.  I want to say what is a girl to do, yet in times like these, the answer is no.  I will not give up.  I am too fixated on losing weight, true.  I have done little or nothing to truly change. It is time to begin.

Sunday, November 23, 2014

In denial or just lazy?

Today, I found myself loving bread.  I went from loving peanut butter and jelly to toast and preserves to just slices of bread.  I didn't any fruits and vegetables.  I am not healthy and I have been a healthy eater lately.  I tend to eat whatever is available.  I realize that I have healthy foods in the house, but my eating habits are poor.  I have no real desire to change, which I know myself makes no sense. What is wrong with me?  I am obese.  I weigh almost 300 lbs.  I have never weighed that much in my entire life except for the last few years.  There were times when I have given up.  I have been willing to change, but I don't know how.  Sadly, I have no desire to change to the detriment of my health. I am not in denial or anything like that, but it still scares me.  I am clueless and fed up, yet seem okay with my poor eating habits.  I am confused.  How do I get past this mindset and not just start over? I just want to start from here and just do better next time.  Help me to balance things out.

Saturday, November 22, 2014

I gave

I basically gave up on myself.  I basically don't wish to gain weight due to health problems at all.  All I consumed today was a large breakfast of sausage, bacon, biscuits, eggs, and grits.  While it tasted good, I am not sure if it was healthy or not.  Also I drank caffeinated coffee, though I heard and read about the benefits of coffee.  I realize that I won't lose a pound that way.  However, I also realize that I won't gain any weight this way either.  My metabolism is kinda funny that way.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Nov 21 musing

I am ashamed of what I did yesterday.  I ate everything, or rather, everything.  Most of the food was not healthy nor nutritious.  I should have known better.  Now I know what it means to watch what I eat.  I often fail to do that sometimes.  I have no excuse.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Cliches ironically speak the truth

Today was a disappointing day overall.  The food was certainly good but still, I sometimes don't always think about what to eat during the course of a day and the effects every bite would have on my health.  Fried chicken tastes good, but what is healthier is baked or broiled chicken.  I wish there was a next time wouldn't be so cliched but it is a lesson to learn here.  I realize how much I hate saying that too.  Even though they are cliched, it is the truth.  Sometimes the truth hurts.

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Today's entry 11/18/14

The truth is, I overate.  This just means that I have eaten and drank over the calorie limit.   I followed, or at least try to follow, the proposed menu.  I almost did with the chicken tomato stew.  This stew was a thick stew with chicken, tomatoes, and loads of vegetables such as corn, green bell peppers, onions, and lima beans.  I don't feel guilty about what I ate, yet I realize that I should have not consumed the white rice, which is not as healthy as brown rice.  I guess there will be tomorrow.

Monday, November 17, 2014

Entry for 11/17/14

So the bad news is that I gained some weight.  Granted, it wasn't substantial, but I gained weight. Since this morning I have consumed many fruits and vegetables such as beans, oranges, stewed vegetables, asparagus and sweet peas.  It is not often that I consume fruits and vegetables in such a large amount.  Therefore, I am proud of myself today.  I have consumed at least 7 or 8 servings of fruit and vegetables.  So far, I have consumed 1426 calories today.  I have just consumed about 1.5 cup of beans just now.  I have always wanted to consumed more fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. I don't feel guilty about what I ate today overall but I was not perfect as I consumed sweetened corn flakes with reduced fat milk.  That I admit was not healthy.  I have learned from this as I wish I have eaten either unsweetened corn flakes or some brown rice.  But it is too late to cry over spilled milk.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Journal Entry for 11/16/14

Toast with Preserves

Roast London Broil with Potatoes and Carrots
Macaroni and Cheese
Green Beans

Corn flakes with 2% milk

Snack 1
Peanut butter and jelly on white

Snack 2
Corn flakes with 2% milk

Snack 3
Sweetened corn flakes with 2% milk

Snack 4
White Toast with jelly
2 sausage links

Number of calories: 2537

I have met nearly all of the health requirements except for the healthy foods I should have eaten. However, 4 servings is quite good considering the number of calories I consumed.

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Journal entry for 11/15/14


Peanut butter and jelly sandwich

Toast and jelly

Snack 1
Wheat bread

Snack 2
Cereal with 2% milk

Snack 3
Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Snack 4

Friday, November 14, 2014

Journal entry for 11/14/14

Peanut butter crackers
Medium Apple

Blueberry Patch Yogurt

Turkey sandwich-plain
French fries

Snack 1

Snack 2

Snack 3
Peanut butter crackers

Snack 4
Grilled cheese sandwich

Snack 5
Wheat bread

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Improved eating habits

So far, things have gotten butter.  Things are not perfect, but have gotten better.  I wonder if there is a link between procrastination, self-esteem issues, and food.  There may be emotional eating on my part.  However, I consumed almost 5 fruits and vegetables ranging from apples to pineapples, to cabbage.  However, I still have a ways to go with my food intake.  I am still not sure if I should change how my entries are written.  I mentioned that I have gotten a bit lazy with them and I would like to change that.

Saturday, November 8, 2014

Entry for 11/8/14

Here is what I consumed today

Yogurt and more yogurt
Fruits: apple, banana, grapes
Peas and Rice
Baked chicken

Maybe I should list what I eat more often.  Then maybe I would get an idea about not only what I ate, but also how I ate.  It has been said that those who write in a journal tend to lose more weight and keep it off.

Friday, November 7, 2014

Today's "menu"

Here is what I consumed today

Yogurt and more yogurt
Fruits: apple, bananas, strawberries, and grapes
French fries
Turkey and cheese sandwich
Raisin Bran cereal with reduced fat milk

I wish I could eat the kind of food that is like other people on a healthy diet.  How do I get over the struggle that comes with eating the way that I do?  I would like to do that.

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Struggle and how to deal with it

I have struggled with food my entire life.  Today I am writing to tell the reader how I really feel.  I have been having low self-esteem for years now and maybe that has been the root cause of my eating lately.  However, that issue has nothing to do with my overeating this past week.  It is all about taking my health for granted.  I consumed healthy as well as unhealthy food.  It will take a while to list what I have eaten today.  I admit that bacon is not a health food and nor are sugary drinks good for me as well.  That is some of what I have consumed today.  There are times when I feel there is no hope in sight.  I am having a hard time listening and I wonder if I should entertain other avenues to lose weight.  I wonder if that will help me cover my issues with food and weight loss in general.  I could say only time will tell but there are times when I feel I don't have much time.  This is one of those times.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Musing for 11/4/14

Let me see...

I started off well, but I suddenly ended up eating anything my hand could find such as cookies, ice cream, and donuts.  I ended up just feeling discouraged about it.  What really happened?  Why did I make such bad choices?  It is hard to believe, but it was so sudden.  I just hope that I won't overeat like this tomorrow.

Monday, November 3, 2014

No change..but I will change just for me.

I will change, but for me only.  My health is and my overall quality of life are too important for me.  I finally have that as a goal.  I will apply it to myself.  I have made no changes since Friday and I have been eating unhealthy foods.  I recall that even though I love foods, they don't always love me.  I do know that there are foods that do love me and it is time for me to get my physical and emotional house in order.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Unhealthy weekend

I don't know what is going on with me.  I have been feeling anxious lately so that may have something to do with it.  I consumed a lot of unhealthy foods for the past 3 days.  I don't feel guilty about it, but maybe I should do a better job of tracking my food intake.

Saturday, November 1, 2014

No change

I did the same thing I did yesterday.  I ate a lot of unhealthy foods and drank soda.  I need help since I have been overwhelmed lately.  I hope to eat better, meaning consuming foods in moderation tomorrow.  I will write about what I ate like I do almost daily.